Were it possible (it is) Zevran goes all the more tense and still, not even breathing. Habit more than anything else has him shifting his grip on the needle, instinct has him ready to jab and that this is what they have come to should rankle. But it is all he knows, this fear. The only familiar thing left to him. Alistair moves away and he can breathe again.
"So you are allowed to want such things and be upset and act upon them but when I do so it is not fair?" He cannot keep Alistair from Adamant. But he can keep him as safe as he can manage until the moment his foolish nobility might kill him.
And that is apparently terrible.
It is selfish, he knows this, it is unreasonable and he does not care. He has been dragged by the hand into being this thing, this figure for so many people and the few he might wish to be more to, to be mortal and flawed and personable do not want that from him. Even during the fifth blight Jonas was permitted to be himself.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2016-07-08 08:19 pm (UTC)"So you are allowed to want such things and be upset and act upon them but when I do so it is not fair?" He cannot keep Alistair from Adamant. But he can keep him as safe as he can manage until the moment his foolish nobility might kill him.
And that is apparently terrible.
It is selfish, he knows this, it is unreasonable and he does not care. He has been dragged by the hand into being this thing, this figure for so many people and the few he might wish to be more to, to be mortal and flawed and personable do not want that from him. Even during the fifth blight Jonas was permitted to be himself.