[It takes a long time for her to answer. For Kieran to be out of earshot, to trust her own voice.
She had never trusted people with Kieran quite so much as she had with Zevran. And she had spoken with Anders without knowing. How has she managed to slip so badly, to misjudge, to let herself become this soft?
Skyhold is as dangerous as anywhere she has been. Templars not agreeing on a path, the abomination put down shortly before she arrived, a rift opening within Skyhold itself, so many Wardens around with Alistair present. No one knows why he and Jonas and Loghain survived after all, that isn't how it goes and with Corypheus?
She is afraid. Afraid for Kieran, angry at herself for putting him in this position and hurt though she doesn't know why. (Because she trusted, because Kieran is happy here, because Kieran could have had so much.)]
Leliana told me. [Does more need to be said? Perhaps, perhaps not.] I am trying to keep him safe.
From...what? Me? If you were going to do that, Morrigan, you are a bit late in acting. Or is this about someone I never exposed Kieran to for various reasons limited to but not including the fact that I was fairly certain you would not wish him to be about him?
And when that man calls himself by another name and wishes to learn shapeshifting? [That...that bothers her. That he might have had lessons from her that could be traced back because she's sure she wouldn't have escaped the blame somehow; she has taught Twisted Fate already after all.]
He is an abomination, there are Wardens from Weisshaupt here. There are some who think this close to a Blight. There are many with sharp minds who could put pieces together.
[And then silence and a quiet breath, her voice soft and low, tired in a way he hasn't heard.]
What do you think many of them would call Kieran were they to learn?
As is his right as a mage that has been hounded all his life and did not have your particular skills nor fortunate to find somewhere else to live without said hounding and torment? There are others here that teach the skill, Morrigan. It would not fall upon you. Even if it did- Leliana would trust your word above such base supposition.
[ How that came to pass, he doesn't know. But it has and while it is interesting? It is not the current point. ]
Yes and I'd walk Kieran brightly and boldly among them with no concern whatsoever for who or what he is- do you think so little of me? Truly. That I would leave anyone I cared for, that I would let a child I cared for to the mercy of those that would do him harm?
Perhaps if he learned to keep his mouth shut, to actually have some sort of sense in his head, I did not know abominations could jest. Tis a long way from Warden to the most wanted apostate in all of Thedas, I am sure Alistair might be able to remind you of their duty, of how it cannot be forsworn?
[Would Leliana trust her? Probably when she was the one who told Morrigan, as a gentle form of questioning to see if she was in on it too. To think that their 'reunion' had been almost peaceful, that it has lurched from bad to worse. That Morrigan is not the one keeping dark secrets this time.]
I do not think much of anyone when it comes to my son. [Not even herself, truth be told, there is always that creeping doubt that names itself Flemeth, the hand always ready to grab her shoulder so it can laugh close to her ear.] Why would you care for Kieran, you are an assassin and we were never friends during the Blight.
Our very own Wynne was like him, Morrigan. A different spirit, a different fate- but an abomination none the less. Even if none of us called her such and none of us spoke of it.
[ Wynne also did not blow up chantries but that is an entirely different matter. Holding 'abomination' over Anders' head as though that is the whole of his sin- belittles the matter. ]
He is Alistair's blood. We were never friends, this is true, but I never wished you ill either. You were clever and sought ways to gain what you needed in order to survive not only a world that would kill you, but your own mother. I respected that. But he is as much Alistair's boy as he is your own and that is why I care for him. Finding your company more agreeable now is a pleasant surprise.
She was your Wynne, not mine. Do not speak as if I were ever close to her. Preaching about her Circle and thinking she knew what was best for us. Did she know with you, all the times she tried to play mother to any of us. Old women are accustomed to power and to playing games to get their own way, on that subject I am an expert.
[There are those who would hold more over his head; a war that has painted an even larger target on the back of many mages, that might go either way and all eyes on the Inqusition already. A war that lead to the Conclave. The Conclave that fed more blood to Haven though this time within the temple rather than to altars.]
He is my son. Alistair and I have spoken on the subject and fatherhood is not the path he would have taken.
Ah, but the headaches she incurred we all enjoyed. Or rather endured. And the henpecking, and the stern glances... 'our Wynne' in much the same way one would say they share a cold. An experience shared.
[ Sentiment may have softened his view- but at the time? He had not cared quite so much. ]
No more that motherhood would have been yours had you any other opportunity available to you. Not that he was ever given much a choice in the matter. Not that he has ever been given much of a choice in any such matter- you wish me not to care for your son? Fine. I care not for your son. I shall not be troubling either of you any longer. Satisfied?
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a note;
Date: 2016-03-07 12:14 pm (UTC)Sending Crystal
Date: 2016-03-07 01:00 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2016-03-07 02:43 pm (UTC)She had never trusted people with Kieran quite so much as she had with Zevran. And she had spoken with Anders without knowing. How has she managed to slip so badly, to misjudge, to let herself become this soft?
Skyhold is as dangerous as anywhere she has been. Templars not agreeing on a path, the abomination put down shortly before she arrived, a rift opening within Skyhold itself, so many Wardens around with Alistair present. No one knows why he and Jonas and Loghain survived after all, that isn't how it goes and with Corypheus?
She is afraid. Afraid for Kieran, angry at herself for putting him in this position and hurt though she doesn't know why. (Because she trusted, because Kieran is happy here, because Kieran could have had so much.)]
Leliana told me. [Does more need to be said? Perhaps, perhaps not.] I am trying to keep him safe.
[Don't be a parent, this is what happens.]
no subject
Date: 2016-03-07 07:50 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2016-03-08 11:09 pm (UTC)He is an abomination, there are Wardens from Weisshaupt here. There are some who think this close to a Blight. There are many with sharp minds who could put pieces together.
[And then silence and a quiet breath, her voice soft and low, tired in a way he hasn't heard.]
What do you think many of them would call Kieran were they to learn?
no subject
Date: 2016-03-08 11:13 pm (UTC)[ How that came to pass, he doesn't know. But it has and while it is interesting? It is not the current point. ]
Yes and I'd walk Kieran brightly and boldly among them with no concern whatsoever for who or what he is- do you think so little of me? Truly. That I would leave anyone I cared for, that I would let a child I cared for to the mercy of those that would do him harm?
no subject
Date: 2016-03-09 09:57 pm (UTC)[Would Leliana trust her? Probably when she was the one who told Morrigan, as a gentle form of questioning to see if she was in on it too. To think that their 'reunion' had been almost peaceful, that it has lurched from bad to worse. That Morrigan is not the one keeping dark secrets this time.]
I do not think much of anyone when it comes to my son. [Not even herself, truth be told, there is always that creeping doubt that names itself Flemeth, the hand always ready to grab her shoulder so it can laugh close to her ear.] Why would you care for Kieran, you are an assassin and we were never friends during the Blight.
no subject
Date: 2016-03-09 10:07 pm (UTC)[ Wynne also did not blow up chantries but that is an entirely different matter. Holding 'abomination' over Anders' head as though that is the whole of his sin- belittles the matter. ]
He is Alistair's blood. We were never friends, this is true, but I never wished you ill either. You were clever and sought ways to gain what you needed in order to survive not only a world that would kill you, but your own mother. I respected that. But he is as much Alistair's boy as he is your own and that is why I care for him. Finding your company more agreeable now is a pleasant surprise.
no subject
Date: 2016-03-13 10:15 am (UTC)[There are those who would hold more over his head; a war that has painted an even larger target on the back of many mages, that might go either way and all eyes on the Inqusition already. A war that lead to the Conclave. The Conclave that fed more blood to Haven though this time within the temple rather than to altars.]
He is my son. Alistair and I have spoken on the subject and fatherhood is not the path he would have taken.
no subject
Date: 2016-03-13 11:18 pm (UTC)[ Sentiment may have softened his view- but at the time? He had not cared quite so much. ]
No more that motherhood would have been yours had you any other opportunity available to you. Not that he was ever given much a choice in the matter. Not that he has ever been given much of a choice in any such matter- you wish me not to care for your son? Fine. I care not for your son. I shall not be troubling either of you any longer. Satisfied?